Prime Minister Stephen Harper, of Canada, has apologized for tonight's Edmonton vs Toronto hockey match. "After the Olympics, casual fans will hate this match up of minor league talent." Harper said.
Toronto, who traded away their franchise changing first round pick for Phil Kessel, has reason to try. "I hate to tell these guys every night to fight hard and play well, because we should have a top 5 pick this year to raise their spirits. Now they are playing for pride. That makes me sick." Ron Wilson, coach of the Maple Leafs remarked.
Edmonton, in 31st place (out of 30 teams) is in more trouble than Toronto. Oilers management loves signing old players to try and put something together, only to lose 45 games a year. Their scouting staff is terribly under funded.
Jimmy Van Der Duke, head scout is even more clueless. When asked who will he draft with the presumably first overall pick, he answered "I don't know, that Delp kid? I don't have time to scout Junior hockey or College hockey. I got season tickets to the Flames."
Even Don Cherry feels for the fans. "This is an absolute joke. The greatest country in the world, can't produce two good hockey clubs to play on Saturday night. I am preparing a statement during Coach's Corner to try and save our beloved country from Euro players and their visor's." He added, "No touch icing."
Harper, after having paid for heart surgery in the United States, is in no shape to veto this game from CBC. He promises next week to have a game with at least one winning team. "I might be able to talk to Bettman for a Phoenix vs Montreal game." He added, "I'm sorry Canada."